Getting The Response You Want

What is the proper way to train our child to come to us?

You don’t say how old your child is, but I am assuming this is a very young child.  However, even toddlers can learn to follow simple commands.  “Training” is exactly the right term for what needs to happen here.  When you call your child, be sure he understands you want him to come to you.  If the child is too young to understand this, first show him what you want. Go to him, move a short distance away, call his name, and guide him to you.  Repeat this, moving farther and farther away each time, until he understands and comes to you on his own.  Every time he responds to your call, give him positive affirmation.  You can make a game of this to train him, but be sure he understands you only call once.  When you feel sure that he understands what you want, continue to give positive affirmation when he comes, but also discipline him when he doesn’t.  Set the standard.  If you want him to come the first time you call, don’t keep calling him over and over until you become frustrated with him.  If that happens, he has trained you to keep on calling.  Call him once.  If he doesn’t come, go to him and tell him you are disappointed that he didn’t come and that there will be a consequence.  Choose a consequence that is appropriate (short time out or loss of the toy he’s playing with, for example), but be consistent.  Don’t give up!  You can do this!